Multifaceted Mama

My Ka’lani is 12 today!  How is that even possible?!  I remember being pregnant with him like it was yesterday.  I was stationed in Hawaii then, not a bad place to be pregnant!  He was due on April 1st, an April Fool’s baby.  Easter was on March 30th that year and I remember feeling the start of contractions while sitting in church on post.  By late that afternoon, I was on my way to Tripler Army Medical Center, the pink hospital that overlooked Waikiki Bay.  I ended up getting sent home that night because my labor wasn’t progressing.  By the next morning, I was back.  I still wasn’t progressing like I should, dilating but not contracting, then contracting but not dilating.  Tripler is on top of a big hill so they sent Ka’lani’s dad and I walking up and down and around that damned hill.  FINALLY, I was admitted and the real fun began!!  He was my longest labor to date, and it was,… interesting!  For one thing, he didn’t want to come out face down like babies are supposed to so that presented a challenege.  The whole experience should have been a clue for me that Ka’lani would always follow his own path in life!  But, at 10:50 that night, while I was focusing on Arsenio Hall, Ka’lani was born!  I had a water front view and I could see the lights in the bay as he came into the world!  Certainly was a memorable sight!

It is tradition in Hawaii that when a haole (non-Hawaiian) child is born, a native Hawaiian bestow a name upon them.  As it happened, my lieutenant was native Hawaiian, so she gave Ka’lani his name, KeKumu’mau’o'ka’lani.  I still have the beautiful Hawaiian card she gave me, explaining the meaning of his name, the eternal source of the heavens! 

So today, I wish all the love and happiness in the world to my Hawaiian sweetie!  I love you so much, Ka’lani!

Holy bus drama, Batman!
I sent the youngest three out to their bus this morning, unaware that drama was about to ensue.  In the midst of trying to tame Donovan’s wild hair (insane amounts of hair spray and a crazy ‘do for the play really screwed with it!) with the flat iron, I realized the phone was ringing.  I ran for it, tripped over my own foot, slammed my face into the door jamb,… and missed it!  Of course.  But I have an answering machine and soon heard that the bus driver wanted me to come out to the stop.  WTF?  All I could think of was that some was puking, bleeding, or all of the above.  No, it was none of the above.  It was Ty, who had refused momentarily to get on the bus.  Fabulous.  I have no idea what set him off, and neither did the driver.  He didn’t throw a screaming fit or anything, just refused to climb on.  By the time I got there, he was on.  He has had bullying problems on the bus (and at school) before so I assume that might have been the problem this morning.  Upon talking to the driver, I discovered that, although I had already talked to the school principal AND the teacher about it multiple times, no one had passed it on the bus driver so he knew nothing about it.  He was really nice about it, just very concerned.

Imagine my surprise, however, when a couple of hours later, I had a knock at my door and it was the driver.  As it turns out, he told the monitor that the bully was Scott.  But that makes zero sense, since he doesn’t sit with or even near him on either bus to their school, so I have no clue why Ty would say that.  He sits with Ka’lani on the first bus and Ka’lani has been seen (including today) rough housing with him on the bus, which is completely inappropriate on Ka’lani’s part.  But, wrong as he may be, he isn’t the bully.  So I am at a loss as to what the issue is, but I will certainly be sitting these boys down tonight and talking to them.  We have been over the bully thing before and none of them know the kid’s name or where he lives.  But, be that as it may, rough housing on the bus is inappropriate and there will be none of that.  So, fun will be had by all, I am sure!

WTF?!
What is it with people and unnecessary attitude?  This isn’t the first time I have bitched about this and I am sure it won’t be the last, but what the hell?  I am so sick of people who act inappropriately and then get pissy if you don’t play along.  And then you have those that ask you for help or for information and when you give it to them, if it isn’t what they wanted to hear, they argue with you about it, tell you that you are wrong, and give you no end of shit.  Well, if they know so much, why the hell are they asking in the first place?!  And God forbid if you stand up for yourself and say something about the attitude!  Then you are the biggest bitch in the world!  Why?  Because I refuse to be disrespected and shit on when I don’t deserve it?!  Excuse the hell out of me!

 Hysterical video!
I saw a great video posted on Ryan Seacrest’s twitter, Rapping Flight Attendant!  I want to fly on this guy’s flight!

My broken blog
I woke up yesterday to a broken blog, and I have absolutely no clue how it happened.  Somehow the “.php” files for most of my plugins were deleted off my server.  I didn’t do it and I don’t have any idea how or why that could have happened.  Because of the plugin installer that comes with the newer versions of WordPress, I no longer have most of the plugins on my hard drive so I couldn’t just upload the missing files.  It was time consuming, but not a big deal and everything seems to be working again.  The biggest problem was remembering everything I had!!  I just wish I knew how it happened in the first place.  Very weird!

Michael Kai
I went to my sister’s baby shower Saturday and finally got to see my beautiful nephew.  He is so tiny but he is adorable.  Auntie Kim spent a great deal of time cuddling and loving and kissing Mr. Michael!  He is so sweet, just like every baby.  He has lost a few ounces since birth and is just under 6lbs now, but perfect in every way!  And my sister?!  The epitome of the fierce Mama! 

The Scarlet Pimpernel
I went to Donovan’s play both Friday and Saturday night and it was fantastic!  They really go all out for their productions and it shows.  The kids work so hard and that shows, too.  I really like that they involve the townspeople in the productions, too, on and off stage.  This year, they had three men from the village in the play, including a local lawyer friend of my fathers.  The orchestra is formed by mixing students with people from the village as well.  These kids are just unbelievable, both with the incredible voices and their ability to throw themselves into the role.  The confidence it takes to get up there and do what they do impresses me, because I certainly didn’t have that when I was that age.  There was a scene in which the Pimpernel and 7 of his cronies are plotting to rescue the French headed for the guillotine.  In order to carry it off, they decided that they needed to disguise themselves as the dandies of that era.  The song and dance that went with it truly required them to have supreme confidence in their masculinity.  And they did a TERRIFIC job of it!  I will have pictures soon!

A very long weekend,…
Between the baby shower and the play, it was a very long and exhausting weekend.  After the play Friday, Donovan and a bunch of the other play people headed to a friend’s house for a little party until 1 am, and there was a cast party the next night, too.  All of this after a couple of grueling weeks of long practices and late nights.  So I am ready for sleep!

Feeling a little less out of sorts,…
For the moment, I think I have gotten over my “f&%k my life” feeling.  Getting a little blog love from Jana, Selina, and Jess made me feel better, too.  Jana is psychologist and she didn’t immediately suggest that I be committed, so that helps!  I still think Corey is right, though, about why I feel the way I do.  I have never given myself the chance to really let go and grieve the way I probably need to.  I think it is more than greiving, though.  I think I just kind of feel beaten down.  So much has happened over the last 9 years with barely a break in between.  One person can only take so much!!

Hazardous duty pay for moms!
I truly think that moms deserve this pay.  There is no telling what nastiness moms have to deal with to properly take care of their kids.  And boys?  Even nastier!  You are exposed to all manners of disgusting bodily fluids, all for no pay.  The love of and for your child is wonderful,… but is it enough when you are cleaning nasty vomit from your living room carpet?  I hesitate to say that it is, and I speak from recent personal experience, thanks to Ka’lani.  He appears to be suffering from some nasty flu bug, which is an experience that neither one of us is enjoying.  What I would enjoy is no vomit and lots of sleep,… without interruptions!

A quote from my friend Jess’ husband Matt that seems appropriate today.  Nothing new happened, just stuff catching up to me, I guess.  This last year has been ridiculous with losing people that I know and/or care about.  And as the anniversary of my grandmother’s passing approaches, I think itis hitting me harder and harder.  There are times when I swear I am losing my mind, though.  I have never been one of those people that is overly sad or depressed or crazy sentimental about random stuff.  But I certainly am now, and it sucks.  It is completely random crap that will set me off and I feel like I am losing my sanity.  Corey insists that I am not but I think he is just trying to be nice AND thanking all that is above that he isn’t here to deal with me!  Nah, I think he has a point.  He thinks I just haven’t let myself grieve my grandmother and my friends that I have lost this last year the way I need to.  He says I am always taking care of everyone else, and I don’t give myself the time of day and that I need to.  That breaking down once in awhile is healthy and probably exactly what I need.  But that is so much easier said than done.  For one thing, it seems like just as soon as I start to get over that edge of grieving, someone else dies and it brings it all back again.  For another, just day to day life gets in the way of being able to take care of myself, physically OR emotionally, especially with Corey deployed.  Between kids, friends, family, and random responsibilities, there is always something going on that needs to be taken care of and that just doesn’t leave a lot of time for me.  Sometimes it seems like all I do is take care of other people and I am left hanging, at loose ends and lost.  Oh, well, I will get over it, as I always do.